How to Stop Hating Yourself
Self-loathing is a dark land studded with booby-traps. Fumbling through its underbrush, we cannot see what our trouble actually is: that we are mistaken about ourselves. That we were told lies long ago which we, in love and loyalty and fear, believed. Will we believe ourselves to death?
Unworthy boldly explores the personal, societal, biological and historical factors that have made some of us our own worst enemies and spurred years of needless suffering. Arguing that 99.9 percent of our low self-esteem isn't reality-based, Unworthy spurs a dialogue and illuminates the steep but crowded path leading toward self-acceptance.
"Anneli Rufus has an incredible insight into the human condition. ... She shows us that no matter what was said or done to us, self-loathing does not have to be our fate. Hers is a strong, sympathetic and encouraging voice."
-- Henry Rollins
"A practical, if heartbreaking, roadmap. ... This book should be required reading for anyone suffering from low self-esteem, and while it will likely cause readers to tear up repeatedly, the empathy and grounded advice is sure to help inspire healing."
-- Publishers Weekly
"Unmasking and destigmatizing the mantle of doubt, fear, guilt and self-blame under which millions of otherwise average Americans quietly suffer and detailing the ways in which self-haters can start to build toward a more accurate understanding of themselves. ...Brutally candid. ... A clarion call to those who struggle with self-loathing that they aren't alone or powerless and that they are capable of healing their battered souls."
"In a market overflowing with self-help books, Rufus has written one that stands out in the crowd. ... This is a hopeful, helpful book for anyone who has struggled to accept themselves."
-- San Jose Mercury News
For frequent updates about Unworthy and the latest self-esteem news, visit the Unworthy blog:
Unworthy: The Big Blog of Low Self-Esteem
- Reviews of Unworthy:
- Publishers Weekly
- San Jose Mercury News
- Everyday Health
- Interviews with me about self-esteem:
- The Sad Secret Successful People Don't Want You To Know
- The Atlantic
- How one author breaks the cycles of self-loathing
- The Chicago Tribune
- In selfie culture, narcissism often means self-loathing
- The Epoch Times
- (Reprint of The Atlantic interview)
- Radio interviews with me about Unworthy:
- Public Radio International
- To the Best of Our Knowledge
- The Roundtable
- KLLC/Radio Alice
- The Liz Saint John show
- Conscious Talk Radio
- Conscious Talk program
- Recent essays I've written about low self-esteem:
- San Francisco Chronicle
- Just you wait: An unopened gift invites anticipation
- Experience Life
- The Unexpected Gifts of Travel
- Psychology Today:
- Who Hates Themselves? It's Not Who You'd Think
- Spirituality & Health:
- Are You Playing Dead?
- Six Spiritual Gifts of Low Self-Esteem
- Huffington Post
- #LowSelfies: A New Healing Strategy for the Insecure
- Huffington Post
- Are You Perpetrating Crimes Against Yourself?
- Rewire Me
- Can You Handle Criticism?
- Low self-esteem in a high self-esteem city
- Psych Central
- Self-Esteem and Friendship: It's Time to Start Trusting Your Friends
- Psych Central
- How Does Despising Yourself Hold You Back?
- Vitamin W:
- Self-Loathing and the Self-Esteem-Industrial Complex
- Excerpts from Unworthy:
- Low self-esteem is good for you
- Spirituality & Health
- You Were Not Born With Low Self-Esteem
- Articles that mention me and Unworthy:
- Women's Health Magazine:
- What Men Think Your Sexiest Quality Is
- Cultivate Your Happiness
- 5 Signs you're a 'negative narcissist'...